That one that sits inside you deep down; it's in your throat, it's in your stomach, and makes you feel like you could burst into tears at any given second.
It's loneliness, sadness, anxiousness, all rolled into one. And it sucks.
Whenever my mom leaves I get sad. I cry and a few days later I'm fine.
It's been a week since we dropped her off and although I miss her like crazy there's another reason why I feel this way;
Two of our best friends got married last night back in California and it hurt that we couldn't be there for them. While I was talking to the bride on the phone it was hard not to cry. They were always there for us. In fact she was my first friend in 2006 who was also a Marine Corps girlfriend. We love them and are so happy for them.
Living so far away from your comfort zone can suck sometimes.
Don't get me wrong; I love my life, I love my daughter, I love my husband, and I love the Coast Guard. I'm just having an off week.
I don't usually complain about things. We want this life. But sometimes I just need to get it all out. In order to be a better mom and wife I need to vent when it all becomes too much. And maybe that's my problem?
I keep things in until I'm about to explode. Which sucks for the MR because then he's the one picking up the pieces with a confused look on his face and lecturing me about how I need to talk about my feelings when I'm feeling them.
It's true. I'm like the guy in the marriage. I hate talking about feelings, I suck at it especially when it's "that time of the month" and I just want to be left alone.
Things will get better, they always do. I'm thankful to have a loving husband who can always tell when something's wrong and can always make me feel better.
It's Saturday and there is no way I'm spending it throwing myself a pity party. So I am off to a lunch with a good friend and to hopefully meet another CG wife who is new here!
♥
